Monday, May 05, 2008
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Ready for the Ice Age?
(should be a question for one of those "ironic questions" list like "Why does sour cream have an expiration date?)
Global warming?
Disconcerting as it may be to true believers in global warming, the average temperature on Earth has remained steady or slowly declined during the past decade, despite the continued increase in the atmospheric concentration of carbon dioxide, and now the global temperature is falling precipitously.
All four agencies that track Earth's temperature (the Hadley Climate Research Unit in Britain, the NASA Goddard Institute for Space Studies in New York, the Christy group at the University of Alabama, and Remote Sensing Systems Inc in California) report that it cooled by about 0.7C in 2007. This is the fastest temperature change in the instrumental record and it puts us back where we were in 1930. If the temperature does not soon recover, we will have to conclude that global warming is over.
There is also plenty of anecdotal evidence that 2007 was exceptionally cold. It snowed in Baghdad for the first time in centuries, the winter in China was simply terrible and the extent of Antarctic sea ice in the austral winter was the greatest on record since James Cook discovered the place in 1770.
Guess Algore cultists don't do facts.
It is time to put aside the global warming dogma, at least to begin contingency planning about what to do if we are moving into another little ice age, similar to the one that lasted from 1100 to 1850.
There is no doubt that the next little ice age would be much worse than the previous one and much more harmful than anything warming may do. There are many more people now and we have become dependent on a few temperate agricultural areas, especially in the US and Canada. Global warming would increase agricultural output, but global cooling will decrease it.
Millions will starve if we do nothing to prepare for it (such as planning changes in agriculture to compensate), and millions more will die from cold-related diseases.
There is also another possibility, remote but much more serious. The Greenland and Antarctic ice cores and other evidence show that for the past several million years, severe glaciation has almost always afflicted our planet.
Oh heck, just go here and read the whole article.
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Thursday, April 17, 2008
Favorite joke.
I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?" I politely said, "This is John XXX and could I please speak to Robin XXXX?"
Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude. I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. She had transposed the last two digits. After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided to call it again.
When the same person once more answered, I yelled "Fuckin' jerk!" and hung up. Next to his phone number I wrote the word "Jerk," and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills, or had a really bad day, I'd call him up. He'd answer, and then I'd yell, 'Fuckin' jerk!" It would always cheer me up.
Later in the year the phone company introduced caller ID. This was a real disappointment for me, I would have to stop calling the jerk. Then one day I had an idea. I dialed his number, then heard his voice, "Hello." I made up a name. "Yo. This is Telly with the telephone company and I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with our caller ID program?" He went, "No!" and slammed the phone down. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're a Fuckin' jerk!"
And the reason I took the time to tell you this story, is to show you how if there's ever anything really bothering you, you can do something about it. Just dial722-4XXX.
The old lady at the mall really took her time pulling out of the parking space. I didn't think she was ever going to leave. Finally her car began to move and she started to very slowly back out of the stall. I backed up a little more to give her plenty of room to pull out. Great, I thought, she's finally leaving.
All of a sudden this black camaro come flying up the parking aisle in the wrong direction and pulls into her space. I started honking my horn and yelling, "You can't just do that, Asshole.. I was here first!"
The guy climbed out of his Camaro completely ignoring me. He walked toward the mall as if he didn't even hear me.
I thought to myself, this guy's a fuckin' jerk, there's sure a lot of jerks in this world.
I noticed he had a For Sale sign in the back window of his car. I wrote down the number. Then I hunted for another place to park.
A couple of days later, I'm at home sitting at my desk. I had just gotten off the phone after calling722-4XXX and yelling, "Fuckin' jerk!" (It's really easy to call him now since I have his number on speed dial). I noticed the phone number of the guy with the black camaro lying on my desk and thought I'd better call this guy, too.
After a couple rings someone answered the phone and said, "Hello."
I said, "You the dude with the black camaro for sale?"
"Yes I am."
"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and the car's parked right out front."
I said, "What's your name dude?"
"My name is Don Hansen."
"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
"I'm home in the evenings."
"Listen Don, can I tell you something?"
"Yes." "Don, you're a fuckin' jerk!" And I slammed the phone down. After I hung up I added Don Hansen's number to my speed dialer.
For a while things seemed to be going better for me. Now when I had a problem I had two jerks to call. Then after several months of calling the jerks and hanging up on them, the whole thing started to seem like an obligation. It just wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be.
I gave the problem some serious thought and came up with a solution.
First, I had my phone dial Jerk #1.
A man answered nicely saying, "Hello."
I yelled "Fuckin' jerk!" But I didn't hang up.
The jerk said, "Are you still there?"
I said, "Yeah.."
He said, "Stop calling me."
I said, "No."
He said, "What's your fuckin' name, pal?"
I said, "Don Hansen."
"Where do you live?"
"1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and my black camaro's parked out front."
"I'm coming over right now, Asshole! You'd better start saying your prayers."
"Yeah, like I'm really scared, Fuckin' jerk!" and I hung up.
Then I called Jerk #2.
He answered, "Hello."
I said, "Hello? Fuckin' jerk!"
He said, "If I ever find out who you are..."
"You'll what?"
"I'll kick your fuckin ASS!"
"Oh yeah? You just wait right there. I'm coming over right now, jerk!" And I hung up.
Then I picked up the phone and called the police. I told them a big gang fight was going down at 1802 West 34th Street. After that I climbed into my car and headed over to34th Street to watch the whole thing.
I turned onto 34th Street and parked my car under the shade of a tree half a block fromJerk #2's house. There were two guys fighting out front. Suddenly there were about12 police cars and a helicopter. The police wrestled the two men to the ground and took them away.
A couple of months go by and I get a call for jury duty. I was picked to be on a trial of two guys charged with disorderly conduct. As luck would have it, it happened to be the same two guys. I might have influenced the jury, because when they announced the verdict, they said, "We the jury find the defendants to be guilty, and a couple of fuckin' jerks!"/\|
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Monday, April 14, 2008
Friday, April 11, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Friday, February 29, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Add your caption.

1. "Why did I marry her? Why didn't I just put a loaded gun in my mouth? Why, God, Why?
2. "Holy crap, look at that ass. Somewhere, a semi-truck is missing its 'Oversized Load' sign.
3. "Can you imagine that lard ass in a thong?"
4. "Somewhere, there's young fat girls naked in a hot tub and I'm stuck here listening to her jabber on about health care.
5. "Sheesh, Rush Limbaugh is soo right - She does sound like Nurse Rachid!"
6. "There's not enough booze in the world to make her look good."
7. "To think I was the among the most popular and powerful of men, can you imagine how much better it would have been without her."
8. "If I hear her say 'the children', 'health care' and 'change' one more time I will puke."
9. "Jeezuz, did Walmart give her a lifetime supply of pantsuits for being a director?"
10. "Hard to believe she took voice and elocution lessons, isn't it, I have no idea what it sounds like when she isn't angry."
11. "Jeez, I wish she'd get some new slogans. . .I wonder if anyone would notice if I slipped out and went to that strip club down the street?"
12. Insert your caption in the comments
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Maytag Neptune MAH AWA 3000 RIP
Guess not!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Election Year
Stopping in at a gun shop while on the campaign trail.Fred Thompson is the only true conservative running for President in '08!
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If you are like me,
"a little" is all you've got!
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Thursday, January 03, 2008
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Saturday, December 08, 2007
More of our Zoo !
Thursday, December 06, 2007
Found the toy in the snow

Dedicated little girl, diving into the snow.

She will be nineteen months old next week.
Monday, December 03, 2007
New Logo for UND?

Go here to get yours!
(No, I "have no dog in this hunt" (or in this controversy) but ya gotta wonder)
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